I have on several occasions spoken “lightly” of the hold food has had on me, and the season of my life when I was in treatment for an emotional eating disorder. It is an ongoing battle not to medicate or self-comfort with food – my “go to” for quick relief in times of anxiety or upset. I have only recently learned that all types of addiction, without exception, are a non-relational way of dealing with a relational issue, but the pull is fierce and the power is unmistakeable when you can reach for something that won’t abandon, won’t reject, will quietly fill in the spaces and soothe with a constancy that never denies, even though it is a momentary fix.
I am fortunate that I don’t experience anxiety much in my life, grateful that my need rises up only randomly now, yet I am painfully aware that there are many engaged in the battle daily, even hourly, who live in and through the struggle as a lifestyle. I would like to share the writing of one such friend, Matraca Taylor Moody, as a guest post today. Will you pray for her, that she stands strong against the lies of the enemy, and keeps her eyes fixed on the One who offers victory in Christ?
Orchestrated bodies move in melody with a harmonious heart, beautifully conducted by the angels themselves. Billowing waves amongst the shoreline of our sanity they test us every living day. Every breath that is lucky enough to make it to our lungs and back out into the conspicuous world is a breath worth breathing. Breathing every day towards the satisfaction of being free should be enough motivation for even the tiniest mind. Treacherous wind builds up towards the galaxy to its highest extent until no more stretch can the arms configure. Outstretched to the maximum Satan becomes angry, jealous that the arms reach and grasp onto the heavens rather than his own purgatory hell. Satan built up ED, constructed him perfectly to fit into our lives at first without notice, but as the hours tick, he becomes more and more boisterous. Arousing any problem he can into the deepest battle known between body and soul. They work coincidentally, ED and Satan. Hand in hand they walk the path of corruption, perpetually destroying lives of the loneliest pursuers. ED strives on vulnerability and turns uncommon scenarios into the most triggering situations. Institutions were built up against him, supplying the needy with classes and tools that everyday citizen’s use. But just as we battle, he matches our integrity. I’m ready to challenge ED, challenge him in battle, war, replicating wounds to use towards my offense. I can take on ED, but as history books and classrooms teach us, wars do not end overnight. Some take months and many take years. I’m fighting the war of my life.
Matraca Taylor Moody